For the Man Who Has Everything ...

... except self-control and self-respect, it's the Uroclub!



"It appears you're just checking out your club" the voiceover says. Yes, it sure does ... but not that club!

The Uroclub is a facsimile of a golf club that you carry in your golf bag. It has a hollowed "grip" that serves as a reservoir for ... urine. Yes, the Uroclub is designed to be peed into by guys who really gotta go. Yep, just stand there, conceal your privates with a towel, unzip (both your zipper and the Uroclub's twist-off top) and let it rip.

We all know guys who need this, right? NO! They don't need another excuse to pee in public! They need an ass-whuppin' for being such gorillas. Were they raised in barns? Did their parents teach them nothing about manners, sanitation, living in a civil society?

Besides, do you really want to carry around a canister of pee in your golf bag the rest of the round?

Let's hope and pray the company never develops a No. 2 iron.

Shocking Expansion of Paula Creamer's Butt

I love the LPGA, and one of the best things about is Paula Creamer's ass. Well, Paula Creamer in general, but in particular her butt. Paula is callipygous.

So I was shocked and horrified to see this photo:



Good Lord, Paula, what happened? Has everything you've eaten in the past six months suddenly gone straight to your hips?

On the bright side, she now has even more ballast for the golf swing.